Penis of the Week

In honor of the amazing marathon session I had last night, my penis will now be called Hoffman.

jess_see

jess_see
Originally uploaded by incident_57.

What an adorable couple. And Nick looks OK too.

Friends with benefits

15 subtle ways to indicate to me you're interested in being friends with benefits:

1. bend over and show some cleavage for more than a second.
2. say, "you ever hear of the 'friends with benefits' concept? what do you think of it?"
3. say, "are you excited to see me or is that a hummer in your pants?"
4. breathe
5. touch my thigh and say, "ooh, somebody's been working out."
6. don't fall asleep
7. walk around in a man shirt and nothing else
8. say, "damn i could use a good lay."
9. i'm going to bed. feel free to join me.
10. point out that the day of the week ends in a "y"
11. stretch
12. sigh, "i just shaved and feel so smooth i don't know what to do with myself."
13. say, "i'm feeling really content with my life and don't want to be tied down. except, you know, to be tied down."
14. call me sailor.
15. say, "damn, i ran out of lotion."

Niche marketing?

Niche marketing?
Originally uploaded by incident_57.

You have to hand it, so to speak, to the porn industry for their creativity. http://www.gamelink.com/display_product.jhtml?src=gl&mall=st&mref=main_p_221813&id=221813

Another young woman with high self-esteem

http://www.uniquepeek.com/fusion_pages/index.php?page_id=216

"he will not face charges..."

http://www.tampabays10.com/weird/weird_article.aspx?storyid=20176

They should lock him up for life. Or 2 weeks. Whichever comes first.
Seriously -- why is it legal for these people to still drive?

The perils of two last names

http://web.umr.edu/~akine/

Never stole

ark5
Originally uploaded by incident_57.

"I never 'stole' a guy. It's not my fault their girlfriends couldn't keep them happy."

Responsibility is a tricky concept.

Bird man from Alcatraz?

OKLAHOMA CITY (AP) -- A man got a prison term longer than prosecutors and defense attorneys had agreed to -- all because of Larry Bird.

The lawyers reached a plea agreement Tuesday for a 30-year term for a man accused of shooting with an intent to kill and robbery. But Eric James Torpy wanted his prison term to match Bird's jersey number 33.

``He said if he was going to go down, he was going to go down in Larry Bird's jersey,'' Oklahoma County District Judge Ray Elliott said Wednesday. ``We accommodated his request and he was just as happy as he could be.
``I've never seen anything like this in 26 years in the courthouse. But, I know the DA is happy about it.''

**
Yes, that's why I got a C in my Computer Science class in college. I asked the professor to match my grade to Jamie Lee
Curtis's cup size. Otherwise I had an A easy.

Kelly - stick

Kelly - stick
Originally uploaded by incident_57.

"I think my breasts are far too big for my body. I'm just a stick with tits."
Is that really a problem?
I think she needs a hug and someone to make her feel good about herself. Fortunately, I am a good hugger.

NBA star needs money for clothes

Marcus Camby is a deuchebag...
http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/news/story?id=2193984

jessica_alba_01

jessica_alba_01
Originally uploaded by incident_57.

What a sweet picture. Too bad the thing on her left eye is so distracting.

Demi

inside-demi
Originally uploaded by incident_57.

Since when did Demi become more masculine looking than Ashton?

It's never too early to shop for next summer's swimwear

http://www.fresh99.com/funny-bikinis.htm

I always like to help women's health

Kim Kelly is a pornography actress from Santa Monica, California. In 2002, the plump Kelly publicly attempted to lose weight by an all-semen diet. She lost 15 pounds by spending 30 days on a diet consisting of semen and banana smoothies. Via fellatio, Kelly extracted and swallowed about three to six teaspoons of semen per day from men who were required to provide health certificates.
Although the 30-day diet was viewed by some as a publicity stunt, some researchers believe that regular oral ingestion of semen from a healthy male in a monogamous relationship may be beneficial for a woman or a man. Semen is low in calories and is rich in nutrients including prostaglandins, selenium, TGF beta, fructose, vitamin C, and zinc.

This will teach the lairy guys a lesson.

kelly_heroes
Originally uploaded by incident_57.

Kelly Brook loves flashing her 32E breasts at male drivers.

The busty beauty, who drives a VW Beetle, has confessed she sometimes gets carried away when she's in the car with her girlie pals.

She admits they show off their boobs and bum whenever male drivers wind them up.

The sexy star, who is set to wed Hollywood actor Billy Zane, revealed: "When I'm driving on the motorway with my girlfriends, male drivers tend to get lairy and give us friendly abuse.

But we play them at their own game and moon out of the window or display our breasts!" .

"Water is very erotic to me"

bbstuff2 (7)
Originally uploaded by incident_57.

I'm very wet now. Does that count?

Ummmm...

39291710.PICT8877
Originally uploaded by incident_57.

Caption of the week?

Pandas

capt.sge.lme20.260905171149.photo00.photo.default-383x270
Originally uploaded by incident_57.

Just because.

No-means...

No-means...
Originally uploaded by incident_57.

Nice ladies' shirt